Developing Emotional Resilience in Times of Uncertainty

 

Hey there! Let’s talk about something we all deal with every single day: habits. You know, those little things you do without even thinking about them. Like brushing your teeth in the morning, scrolling through your phone before bed, or grabbing a snack every time you’re bored (guilty as charged!). Habits run a big part of our lives, and whether we realize it or not, they’re shaping who we are and what we accomplish.

So, what’s the deal with habits? How do they work, and more importantly, how can we build ones that actually help us? Grab a comfy seat (and maybe a cup of coffee), and let’s dig into the psychology of habit formation together. Trust me, it’s simpler than it sounds, and with a little effort, you can make some seriously positive changes.

What Are Habits, Really?

At its core, a habit is just something you do automatically. It’s your brain’s way of saving energy. Imagine if you had to consciously think about every single thing you do all day long: tying your shoes, driving to work, or even chewing your food. Exhausting, right? That’s why your brain loves habits—they’re like shortcuts that let you go on autopilot.

But here’s the kicker: your brain doesn’t care if the habit is good or bad. As long as it’s repeated enough, it’ll stick. So, if you’ve ever wondered why it’s so easy to binge-watch TV but so hard to stick to a workout routine, now you know—your brain’s just following the patterns you’ve trained it to follow.

The Habit Loop: Cue, Routine, Reward

Okay, here’s a little psychology 101 for you: habits are built around a simple loop—cue, routine, reward. Let me break it down:

1. Cue: This is the trigger that starts the habit. It could be a time of day, a feeling, or something in your environment. For example, feeling stressed might cue you to reach for a bag of chips.

2. Routine: This is the actual habit or behavior. In our example, it’s eating the chips.

3. Reward: This is what you get out of the habit. Maybe the chips make you feel comforted or distracted from whatever’s stressing you out.

Understanding this loop is super helpful because it means you can start to tweak it. Want to stop a bad habit? Try changing the routine while keeping the same cue and reward. Want to build a new habit? Attach it to a cue that already exists in your life.

My Personal Habit Struggle (and Win)

Let me tell you a quick story. For the longest time, I had this habit of hitting snooze on my alarm… like, five times. Mornings were a disaster. I’d be rushing around, stressed out, and barely making it out the door on time.

One day, I decided enough was enough. I wanted to be one of those people who woke up early and actually enjoyed their mornings (wild concept, right?). So, I set up a simple habit loop. My cue was the sound of my alarm. Instead of snoozing (routine), I forced myself to sit up and drink a glass of water that I’d put on my nightstand the night before. My reward? Feeling proud of myself for not hitting snooze and having a few extra minutes to relax before starting my day.

Was it easy? Nope. The first week was brutal. But over time, it got easier, and now it’s just part of my routine. The best part? My mornings are so much less chaotic, and I actually look forward to starting the day.

How to Build Positive Habits

Ready to build some habits of your own? Here are a few tips to get you started:

1. Start Small

Big changes are exciting, but they’re also overwhelming. If you want to start working out, don’t aim for an hour at the gym right away. Start with 10 minutes of movement at home. Small wins build momentum, and that’s what you want.

2. Stack Your Habits

This one’s a game-changer. Take a habit you already have and attach a new one to it. For example, if you always make coffee in the morning, use that time to practice gratitude. While the coffee’s brewing, think of three things you’re thankful for.

3. Use Visual Cues

Make your new habit hard to ignore. Want to drink more water? Leave a water bottle on your desk. Trying to read more? Keep a book on your pillow so you’ll see it before bed.

4. Be Patient

Here’s the truth: building habits takes time. Studies suggest it can take anywhere from 18 to 254 days to form a habit, depending on the person and the habit. So, if it doesn’t stick right away, don’t beat yourself up. Just keep showing up.

5. Celebrate Your Wins

Seriously, don’t skip this part. Every time you stick to your new habit, celebrate it. It doesn’t have to be big—a little fist pump, a smile, or even telling yourself, “Good job!” can make a difference.

Breaking Bad Habits

What about the habits you want to ditch? The process is similar but flipped. Identify the cue, replace the routine with something healthier, and keep the reward. For example, if your cue is boredom and your routine is scrolling through social media, try swapping it for reading or going for a quick walk instead.

Another tip? Make the bad habit harder to do. If you’re trying to cut back on junk food, don’t keep it in the house. Out of sight, out of mind.

Your Turn

Alright, now it’s your turn. Think about one habit you want to build or break. What’s the cue? What routine can you create or change? And what reward will keep you motivated?

Take it one step at a time. Remember, habits aren’t built overnight, but every small effort adds up. Before you know it, you’ll be crushing it. And hey, if you ever stumble along the way, that’s okay. Just pick yourself up and keep going. You’ve got this!

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